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Tuesday, September 22, 2009

What was she thinking?!?

As a parent, I could probably just start an entire blog entitled ‘What was he/she thinking?!,’ and this particular incident would probably be in the top 10. 

Prior to our things arriving, Sophia and Kathleen slept in government-provided beds (which are now in the ‘furniture room,’ one day to be Edwin’s room along with three other beds and various other furniture).  Kathleen had a twin, but Sophia was in a folding port-a-crib.  Cribs generally aren’t particularly fascinating, but this crib had an attractive (to Kathleen) feature: wheels.

Many an evening we would find Sophia wheeled over next to Kathleen’s bed and sometimes Sophia would be woken from a sound sleep by her sister playing bumper cars with her crib and the other bed in the room.

One afternoon, I took a nap.  Kathleen and Sophia also took a nap, but evidently they woke up before I did because Sophia’s crying woke me up from my nap.  Groggily (after trying to ignore the cries for a few minutes), I went to find what Kathleen had been doing to bother her sister.

When I got to their room, however, they were nowhere to be found.  Continuing down the hallway in search of my misbehaving three year-old, I saw something odd: Sophia’s crib, in the kitchen.  When I looked further, my pace increasing to a run, I saw things in Sophia’s crib other than just Sophia.

Upon arriving in the kitchen, I found Sophia sitting partially buried by piles of clothes.  Kathleen had decided to amuse herself by emptying the entire laundry bag into Sophia’s crib and then adding their entire winter wardrobe that had been in their closet on top for good measure.  Figuring that Sophia would need some shoes to go with her clothes, Kathleen threw in all of the shoes she could find for good measure, too.

Not content with merely clothing her sister, however, Kathleen decided that Sophia needed fed.  And that’s where the kitchen came in.  Not only was Sophia under piles of clothes, but she had several litres of UHT milk, ketchup, lemon juice, Worsterchire sauce, cheese, butter, green beans, okra, peppers, tomatoes, and about twenty packages of yogurt. 

By this time I was livid.  Kathleen knew not to put clothes in Sophia’s crib (she learned that from my reaction several days before when she had put everything in their room in Sophia’s crib), she knew not to leave her room during naptime, and she knew to leave the food in the refrigerator.  What was she thinking?!?

But the last, the ultimate, the final outrage, the one that left her in the dark hall bathroom for three hours until her father came home, the one that left me with an hour and a half of cleanup and two loads of laundry to wash, fold, and put away, was the eggs.

Yes, eggs.  Eggs are funny in how easily they break.  They break when cracked in a bowl.  They break when dropped on the floor.  And they most certainly break when tossed into a crib full of sister, clothes, and food.  And when they break they get on everything: clothes, sister, crib, food, and floor.


Brynn said...

These stories definitely aren't funny in the moment (Em eating poo), but they're pretty darned funny fairly quickly. Thanks for sharing!

UnkaDave said...

If I may suggest an explanation here, it sounds like you've got a congenital shopper, someone who received a double copy of the SHOP-275 region on the 12th chromosome. This is manifest phenotypically by the uncontrollabe urge to push things with wheels around inside buildings, throwing in everything within reach, ignoring the consequences (dark bathroom x 3 hours, credit cards maxed out, etc.) Good luck when this kid gets older.
By the way, thanks for the post!!

Jake and Rachelle said...

Too funny! Can't wait to see pics of your apartment.

PaulaJean said...

It really is funny, when I'm not the one woken up from my nap or having to clean up the resultant mess.
And she'd better not do that at Grandmas!!
Eggs, icky, icky!!!

Lydia said...

yeah, eliza & mairyn did that about an hour before guests were to arrive. egg + living room carpet, fireplace hearth and sofa = renting a Rug Dr. and cleaning all day instead of entertaining. i feel the pain. they also did a "get into my makeup and use it all over sister, the carpet, walls & dresser" when grant was about 2 weeks old. yeah, we're experienced with mess. sorry.

Lindsay Edward said...

Now I'm understanding all too well why my parents reversed our bedroom doorknobs with the lock on the outside, when we were younger...