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Thursday, July 9, 2009

Can I see where they keep the ark of the covenant?

A few days ago, I made a trip to Hagerstown, Maryland. For those of you not employed by the State Department (most, if not all), you may not be familiar with Hagerstown.

Five months ago, some men came to our house. They packed up all of our things in boxes, some in big boxes, some in small boxes, and some of it not in boxes at all. Then they drove off. A few weeks later when we came to our house in Arlington, a few of the boxes showed up, but not most of them. They disappeared into the vast unexplored and unexplained workings of Government Bureaucracy.

This Tuesday I set out to find the actual physical location of the rest of my boxes. So I drove northwest into the mountains (ha!) of Maryland. At one point I passed under a pedestrian footbridge labeled "Appalachian Trail." After 90 minutes of driving, I turned left by a blue water tower and parked next to a very large building that I mistakenly took to be an airplane hangar based on its proximity to an airport landing strip.

Instead of housing airplanes, however, this particular large building turned out to be one of the Government Warehouses that contain, according to some, all of the interesting stuff that ever existed and has been confiscated by the Government. And upon looking, one indeed could not tell what treasures were contained in this particular Warehouse. All I could see were 4x4x8 wooden crates, neatly stacked to the ceiling. The only ones that I could have access to, however, weren't quite as exciting as Indiana Jones movies. They just had all of that stuff that disappeared. And the others? The guys at the Warehouse weren't talking.


PaulaJean said...

Just hope that no one opens the crate with the ark while your stuff is there.

Latter-Day Guy said...

Funnily enough, the patriarch of the Ethiopian Orthodox church said that he would soon reveal the Ark of the Covenant. Of course, then he reneged, and merely declared that he had seen it, that it was real, and that it was pretty. A bit of a downer really... and I was all geared up to see the exploding heads and melting faces. :(